It's been a few years since I've produced a fully instrumental album. The titles of the tracks on "Self-Sabotage" are a bit dark, which might lead some to think that this album is about depression, or guilt, or fatalism. There may be some truth in that. As someone who has loosely played within the "industrial" music sandbox since the mid-90s, this would be typical. However, time has a way of changing one's perspective.
When I was younger, I often allowed anger with the world to color my creations, which can result in monolithic, broad-brush creativity. Today, I hunt for nuance, trying to understand where some of that anger is coming from, and what others are experiencing. Perhaps that which angers me isn't really that bad, when I consider what some of my fellow human beings are dealing with. My personal life is, for the time being, quite positive and it is only when I look closer at the world around me that I feel any overwhelming disappointment, hopelessness, or anger. Perhaps I look too closely - something we don't often have time to do when we are younger.
I'm most angry when others are being hurt, but disappointed that it's often self-inflicted, or in some way endorsed. Why do we do this? Perhaps the hopelessness that we all feel at times can lead us to make some pretty poor decisions, from active self-sabotage to passive neglect. I think that is what I have tried to express in the music of "Self-Sabotage". Sure, these are dark times that can be painful and even oppressive, but we can still try to understand them and gain perspective, and with that understanding comes hope.
I hope this new year brings to you a host of new experiences that change how you look at the world. Special thanks to my friends at Point Source Electronic Arts for believing in this album and helping to make it happen. And great thanks to YOU for your continued support!
Jeff / Testube